Wow! One month; already??? December 9th came and went like each and everyone of the other thirty-four days I have been in India. That being said it did make me stop and think. The time had a feeling of oppositions; it seemed to be both a small and large amount of time. Small in that one month out of twenty-nine years is minimal, large in that one out of four months in India is significant. Very significant. In fact that means I have already experienced a quarter of my trip! A quarter!!!
I chose to sit down and write about what I had experienced thus far in India to see if I was hitting my targets and having the Indian experience I truly wanted. In the past thirty-four days I have visited one of the main metropolises of India, Mumbai, and I wasn’t attacked, robbed, or hassled. I did have one fight with a rikshaw driver, but was proud to have stood my ground and show myself that I can be a ‘tough cookie’, if I so choose.
I have toured around Udaipur; one of the most majestic cities in Rajasthan where former Majaranas lived in beautiful palaces. Pretty fantastic. Here is where I got to experience my very first Diwali! A special treat indeed. Every year my best friends’ family holds a Diwali party in Ontario. Every year her parents say to her “Do you know who would really enjoy this? Stephanie. I wish she were here to enjoy this”. Every year my best friend tells me that her parents say this to her, and I feel sad that I haven’t been able to experience Diwali myself. Well mission accomplished! Diwali was brighter, lighter, and far more lively that I ever dreamed possible. I loved the candles, fireworks, strings of electric lights, flower garlands, flower votives floating in the lake, the music, the food, the sweets in particular. I loved it all and was so thankful that I was able to experience it, first hand, in India. The only thing that was missing was my best friend and her family. Luv you Jazzy, Kavi, Harry, and Nicki!
I learned how to milk cows. This may seem trivial or unimportant to some, or most. But I thought it was really cool. I grew up in the suburbs! There are no cows! The only cows are the ones we make of ourselves at family functions or holidays. Really, they are not in my reality. I drive by them when traveling to other cities, through rural areas. The fact that I was able to learn a new skill, with a new friend, Accram, and with a sacred animal of India, is pretty darn cool. I hope to someday have a farm. Not with cows, but with goats, so I can make goat milk cheese. But you have to start somewhere.
Also while in India I have been able to revive my passion for social justice and connect with many people over the subject. This weekend I am heading to Delhi to see Dr.Shiva speak and meet some more people who are interested in similar themes and topics. Meeting Anoop and connecting with him over sustainability in India has really motivated me to make social justice part of my daily practice. It is something I have let go of a little bit too much over the past several years. Yes it always comes up in different ways, and I always have a mind for it, (i.e. I constantly critique, analyze, and mentally dialouge certain topics or issues as I was trained to do). But I feel motivated to do a little bit more and keep it as a practice, not just a once in a while occurrence.
I experienced an ashram. Yes it is a bit stereotypical but I enjoyed it. I think there is value and importance in what ashrams have to offer, even if you are not Hindu. The ashram brought me back to a place of reflecting on my daily practices, and to what and where I put my daily energy. A very good reflection indeed.
While in India I also received my very first Indian outfits. I picked out the material, got measured, and had them tailored. Amazing! Btw I have never had tailored clothes before. I liked the experience! My friend Elisa and I also did a photo shoot with our new clothes. A little awkward, but fun. All of the bad photos have already been deleted, of course. The photo shoot was also a good reminder to stay away from barfi and ladoo. I want to look beautiful and elegant in my new suits, not like the cows I mentioned earlier!
Kathak dance. One of my life long dreams has been to learn Indian dance. I used to watch Bollywood movies, not for the plot, but for the exciting colour, energy, and dance! Confession time; I have also dreamed of performing Indian dance at my wedding. Well lets be specific, not at the ceremony, afterwards at the reception. I wanted a whole choreographed number to perform for my new husband, family, and friends. Whoops, surprise ruined! Perhaps this is just a secret desire to have my life miraculously turn into a Bollywood movie . .. hhhmmmmm?!?!?!?!?!? Taking the Kathak dance classes has been a dream come true. I absolutely love it, except when I get dizzy from spinning around too many times! I feel soo strong, powerful, able, and confident when I dance. It is quite the feeling. The feeling gets better when my teachers, and classmates also mirror this energy back to me and tell me how good at it I am. After seven days of one hour classes I had a routine down, which was performed, in full dress, and recorded. Pretty fantastic. No I take that back; pretty supercalafragalistically FANTASTIC!!!
All this in one month, and these are only the highlights! There are things I still struggle with in India, come on it is not all roses all the time. One such example are the flies. My step mother, originally from India, hates flies. She will do everything in her power to eradicate all flies within a half kilometre radius of her. Now I know why; they are everywhere, all the time, and they are disgusting. Flies land on the piles and piles of cow shit, which are all over the streets, then on you, or food, or . .. everything. It is gross, unpleasant, and super irritating.
Another thing is not the toilets but the toilet seats. They do have squatters in India, not the biggest fan, but I got the knack of it when I was traveling in Southeast Asia. But the ‘English style’ toilets they have are like the ones you have in Canada but the toilet seats are different. The problem is twofold; 1) they are not the proper size for the toilet and 2) they are not fastened tightly. This basically means that every time you sit down on a toilet you fear for your life as your weight may not be equally distributed and you may slide one way or the other, hopefully not down into the toilet. One day my poor butt cheek actually got pinched between the seat and toilet. The toilet seat slided one way, then the opposite way thereby pinching my soft tushy in between the two. I was unimpressed!
Lastly the men. The last time I was in a country where men ogled me all the time was Latin America, so it has been awhile. The worst is when groups of men are hanging out together, because they look, and chat, and make remarks, or whatever, as a group. It is intimidating on top of being gross and impolite. What bothers me more is that I’m pretty sure the attraction comes, solely, from the colour of my skin. Skin colour aside, I can’t stand the constant attention from men. From women as well, but only because I am a novelty, not because they are attracted to me. I am a constant spectacle no matter what I am wearing. People come up to me on a daily basis asking to have a picture of me, or to have their picture taken with me! Apparently I am a celebrity in India. I always say ‘no’ to the guys who ask to have my photo. If it is a couple or a family I don’t mind as much. Perhaps they find us Westerners attractive and beautiful much they same way I find beauty in all of the Indian women here. It could be the exotic, unique, or ‘different’ that we find alluring and appealing in contrast to what our norms are? Either way it takes getting used to!
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